Holiday of Romance, Recreation & Reflection in the Philippines

When I told myself I would not come home in the next year or so back in 2019, of course, I had no idea what would happen. Not that anyone can predict the coming of the COVID-19 pandemic. Add some more personal reasons, I ended up not coming home for 3 years. It isn't dramatic enough to sell a story, but I felt homesick for the first time. Finally, after my long yearning, I found my way back home. A short and sweet 3 weeks of holiday in the Philippines, it's one hell of a roller coaster ride!

Pre-holiday anxiety, is that even a thing?

While roaming around the capital of the tiny Islamic nation of Brunei, my mind was preoccupied with my upcoming holiday in the Philippines. With so many things to do and so many people I wished to meet, how the f*ck do I squeeze them all in 3 short weeks? Ultimately, it came down to having a schedule and errands every.single.day. My days were numbered and all accounted for. I spent a lot of time apologizing to those I couldn't meet.

In the end, I left Brunei with a heavy heart. I couldn't focus on exploring the destination because my mind was already in the Philippines. Before I knew it, I was finally home.

Recreation: The Philippines' Highest Mountain, the mighty Mount Apo

Pay yourself first, they said. So after spending the first few days on gift-giving, the Filipino tradition of Pasalubongs, I took a domestic flight to Davao City. It was my first (and) solo trip outside Luzon and I was thrilled.

After a decade of hiking, I finally reached the summit of Mount Apo via the Santa Cruz Trail!

Mount Apo is the highest summit in the Philippines and I thought it was the end game for me since I'm an OFW anyway. It turns out, that's the biggest lie I ever uttered to myself. Mount Apo left me wanting and thirsty for more mountains in the Philippines.

Its beauty sent my soul on a trip down memory lane to my early days of hiking. So much has changed: the hiking community, the dynamics of arranging climbs, and even myself. As I enter the next chapter of my hiking journey, the Mount Apo climb served as the end and the start of a new era. I'm nervous about what to come next, but bring it on baby!

Romance: Friendly dates, a trip to Boracay, and a Wedding!

With all due respect to my single-blessedness at the moment, it did not occur to me that my life is lonely and boring. Our platonic friendships-turned-love filled the tiny void inside me, whatever that void represents.

A decade's worth of teasing, laughter and tears, social drinking and adventure, all of us are still friends. We all have different (and busy) lives now but no matter how time flies in front of our eyes, we are still that bunch of people, nothing perfect, yet indulge in the presence of one another. Plus we're all just a text (okay it's Messenger now) away. I don't deserve their love but I probably did something good in my previous life for me to have them.

But the story didn't end there yet. If you tell me friends can't have a beautiful and meaningful friendship behind the screen of a smartphone, sorry but you're wrong.

Ariane and I shared most of our intimate and vulnerable moments virtually despite meeting only twice in over 3 years. We laughed and cried, got our hearts broken in different ways, fell in love again, survived a mid-life crisis (still surviving), endured life and the frustrations together and so much more. If pen pal was still a thing, we're second to none. 😉

Coffee & dinner dates with friends (Jette & Ariane), Boracay trip (we stayed at Hannah Hotel and I can vouch for them!) with Dra. Joy, and a wedding of our two beloved friends Alyssa & Arnold, love is absolutely in the air. You filled me with so much rest and love that I don't need a Valentine's Date anymore. 😉

Reflection: From a Receiver to a Giver

Gone are the days when my mom and I struggled for basic needs. It's now all in the past and our humble beginnings made me wish to be on the other side of the spectrum. I don't even dream of being wealthy, but enough to pay my blessings forward. It surely took a long way, but, eventually, that day came.

Hitting two birds with one stone, I gathered the whole family for an overnight family outing at TJM Hot Spring Villas in Los Banos, Laguna to celebrate my mom's 70th birthday! I'm speechless and happy because my mom and I have come so far. We're both lucky to endure the past and we're now reaping the seeds of our resilience and perseverance.

If there's one thing I could've ever wished for at that moment, it's the missing piece of my puzzle, my dad. What if he's still alive? Will he scold me for the poor choices I've made? Or will he be finally proud of me compared to that time when he told me I didn't know what I wanted back then?

Several unanswered questions, but no chance of hearing the answers anymore. I guess I never finished grieving for him in the first place. But it is what it is, he will never come back. As I shift my eyes to the present, I'm back to being the grateful person I always am.

Post Holiday Sentiments:

At the end of my holiday in the Philippines, I was dead tired but my heart was full. I was excited to come back home (to Dubai) to sleep and to process all the emotions, memories, and insights collected over the past three weeks. It's short as usual, but it's the best holiday I ever had. Of course, it comes with a price - an arm and a leg. I can afford it thank God, but not all the time.

Similar to my promise back in 2019, I told my mom I wouldn't be coming home in the next year or so. So who knows when I'll be back? For now, let me close this with wishful thinking, that I'll be able to find my way home soon, whenever that be. That's all, ciao!